One thing I've managed to figure out how to do (in an otherwise rather unproductive summer) is learn to crochet. I rented a how to dvd from the library and that helped in teaching me how to do the various crochet stitches but I had to go to a knitting/crochet circle at the craft store up north to learn how to crochet a pattern. This water bottle carrier is my second finished Amigurumi, isn't he goofy? He's from a pattern in 'Super Crochet Wonderful' by Narumi Ogawa.

There is this one "friendship" I can't seem to let go of, and I really need to. We used to have a lot in common and our families spent a lot of time together but she and I have grown apart over the years and I feel like she just doesn't really like me that much anymore. Our oldest kids are close friends and I feel like that's the only reason she even pretends anymore, but it hurts me to be around her. She works and I don't, I think she thinks I have it so easy. I know I do in a lot of ways but we give up a lot with me being home. Hell, I give up a lot being home and not in ways that involve money. Although that is something too.
I just like her and wish she felt the same about me, that is so junior high, isn't it? Why don't you like meeeee???
I often wonder if she feels I used her because I have asked her for help with the kids on occasion. She works from home and I have asked her for help in a pinch, maybe that pissed her off? Who knows, my oldest was spending a lot of time over their house, maybe she was resentful that I don't reciprocate as much? I wish she would just come out and be honest with me.
I have to end this, but I feel like I need to hash it out with her, but what's the point, really?

Felling pathetic..

So I leave you with photos of of my boy that I took last week while playing with the macro setting on my camera.

My baby girl turns 9 tomorrow. I love her madly yet she exasperates me like no other. She's creative, funny, generous, helpful, affectionate and talented. This is the child who will spend 3 days making a stuffie cat for her mama's birthday even though it was pretty hard and she got frustrated. She helps the younger kids in her mixed ages class, she plays with her little brother endlessly and still loves to cuddle with her precious blankie.
Happy Birthday my darling girl!

What I'm obsessed with these days:

1. The Office (US version)
I just started watching this show regularly this season. It is just so damn hilarious. I love all the cringe worthy Michael moments, Dwight's nuttiness. But what has me right now is the whole Jim and Pam saga, I am such a sucker for the unrequited love. The fact that the actor that plays Jim is really cute helps too.

2. Death Cab For Cutie
Ok, I am late to the party on this group but I am really into their latest 2 cds. My current repeat play is 'Someday You Will Be Loved'

You'll be loved you'll be loved
Like you never have known
The memories of me
Will seem more like bad dreams
Just a series of blurs
Like I never occurred
Someday you will be loved

It reminds me of my first serious boyfriend, he should have told me this. It would have saved me plenty of grief. Dork...

3. Amigurumi
These are so freakin' cute! But alas I am crochet challenged and have yet to master how to make these adorable little creatures. I can do all the basic crochet stitches (is that what they call them?) but when it comes to reading patterns I am a total moron. Picture me sitting in the corner complete with dunce cap.

4. Swap-Bot
The love continues. I have pared down the amount of swaps I joined for the summer but I still lurk about the site, reading the forums, checking out profiles of swappers and reading all the swap descriptions.

So how about you, my half dozen or so readers? What are you into right now?

We went flying today! The local airport had a 'Fly-In". They had planes rides in a 2 seater open cockpit bi-plane and 4 person Cessna. I *really* wanted to go on the bi-plane but it was just too expensive, so we divided up and went on the Cessna.
The pilot took us over the lake, we saw our cottage, it was so fun!

Look at my little man, he had such a great time. I love how excited he gets about everything.

Oh boy, it's after midnight, that means it is offically my birthday!

Well, you know it's summer around this blog, even less blogging from me than usual.

My migraines are still bad, I go for my next series of injections for this Botox as migraine prevention study I'm in. It's a blind study so I could get the real thing or a placebo. I really hope I got the placebo last time because my migraines have been as frequent and painful as usual. I have been getting migraines on a pretty regular basis since I had my oldest child almost 13 years ago. I often wonder if I would have been a much better mama if I wasn't plagued by these damn things.

So here's the list of things I've tried to reduce or eliminate the headaches and/or the triggers that cause them:

1. Feverfew taken daily
2. Regular exercise
3. Massage therapy
4. Chiropractic
5. Acupunture
6. Antidepressants
7. Talk therapy
8. Magnesium supplements
9. CO-Q 10 supplements
10. Cranial-sacral therapy
11. Reflexology
12. Physical therapy
13. Beta Blockers

There are more but I can't think if them at the moment. Some of these have helped, but were way too expensive to continue
on a regular basis. None of them eliminated the migraines completely.

Me and the boy at my work table, I was looking at the pictures in my blog of this table when I first set up my work area and it's so different. Unorganized and messy now, it took about a week to go from immaculate to disaster.

I'm listening to a recording of the old time radio show, the Lux Radio Theater version of Madame Butterfly with Cary Grant, of all people. They make Pinkerton out to be the good guy in this one, I don't think he was in the opera, was he?
Guess I should brush up on my Puccini? Is that even spelled right?

Remember that Malcolm McLaren version of Madame Butterfly? Or am I the oldest person on Blogger?

Made this guy for a felted sweater creation swap. He started off as a cat but slowly evolved into an owl. Jeez, what a bad picture.
My daughters didn't want me to mail him, but we had to. Hopefully he's reached his new home by now.

I had problems initially with this swap. I had already made a stuffed mouse from these same two sweaters a couple months ago and wanted to make something different so I decided to move out of my comfort zone and make a little purse. Oh boy, was that a disaster. It was clunky and ugly and the needle felting I attempted on it was just plain sad. So I had to go back to my old trusty stuffie making self. Oh well, I tried, right?

Our Memorial Day weekend was fun, I am bummed that I missed out on our friends and their 3 kids visiting us on Sunday because I had a day long migraine. argh....
Get a load of my adorable kayakers.

We sold the bike seat and I find myself so sad about it. That bike seat has held all 3 of our children on several different bikes and many, many memorable family bike rides. Our littlest is now 4 and 1/2 and just too big for it, so we decided that now is the time. There will be no more babies of ours to ride in that seat and kick us while we pedal to the park or the Pere Marquette trail we love so much. No more babies to wriggle their feet out of the straps, causing whoever is cycling to come to an abrupt halt and fix those feet before they get hurt. We've been reaching so many of these kinds of 'last baby' moments lately, the last 2 times I had a four year old, I also had a newborn. No wonder I am so reluctant to let this boy of mine grow up too fast, I indulge him and his whims way more than I did with the girls. So true is the stereotype of the baby in our family, he is charming and gets his way more often than not.

So now he'll be pulled in the bike trailer until he can ride on a bike himself, and then I'll be writing another post about how we sold the Burley and how sad I am to see it go. Life goes on

Thanks for the sweet comments on my whine post from yesterday. Just to clarify, I wasn't referring to any one group or any one person in my rant. I seem to feel like this about all of my social networks. Not that there are that many, but you know what I mean. I know that I make myself feel like the outsider, that rotten little voice in my head that says I'm not good enough or special enough to be included.

Ok, let's not be depressing for two days in a row.

My 8 year old went to the eye doc yesterday and it turns out she's farsighted in her right eye. She'll need to wear glasses for
reading and working (haha) on the computer. I was shocked as I thought for sure she'd take after me (as she does in all other ways) and be nearsighed. But she isn't, and I'm glad for her. The frames she picked out are kind of boring, but I didn't tell her that. I wanted her to pick out these really cute and funky ones but she went for the more school marmish ones. No, I didn't criticise her choice! I was very supportive. That's what us mamas are supposed to be, right?

I am thinking of buying a Wii for the kids (um, yeah, just the kids), it just looks so fun in the ads. they really emphasize the fact that you can be standing and active while playing. I like that. It's pricey though and I know we indulge our kiddos so much, so I am still in the thinking stages right now. we'll see, that's my motto today.

Warning, navel gazing and much whining below. Not the usual theme of this blog. Read at your own risk.

I'm feeling left out.

I used to think that being popular didn't matter once you got out of high school, but now I'm not so sure. I don't think I'll ever be that person that everyone wants to be best buddies with. Why is that? I'm funny, interesting, fairly well read, a good listener. Dammit, I'm good enough, right?
channeling some self-help guru here...

So why am I not the one being invited anywhere? Why does it seem I am the one who has to set something up for me to be included? I don't get it. Why do I seem to be last on the list? Do I have to extend myself even more than I feel I already do?
How come some people can come into a situation or a group and barely know anyone and then all of a sudden they are best pals with several others? How do they do that? I really would like to know.

I used to think not having close friends anymore was because of isolating myself when I when through episodes of depression but I have been really pushing myself to socialize for more then 6 months and things feel the same.

None of these feelings are being helped by the fact that my cousin, who has been my very closest friend since we were kids has pretty much dumped me for a guy she met last summer. They were living together after 3 months and got married after 6 months. She has not told me any of this herself, I've heard it allthrough the grapevine. real, nice, huh? I'm really hurt and cannot even bring myself to think about it too much.

The Craft Extrvaganza was awesome, we bought tons of loot. I will post pic in another post. My camera batteries are recharging at the moment.

I found a great tutorial for a coin/credit card holder at this site
http://www.splityarn.com/

I made 3 of these for a small handmade item swap at Swap-Bot. It was scanned so it looks a little flat, but I really love the way they came out. I must make more.

The girls and I are going to this today, I think we'll find lots of cool goodies. I'll try to post pics of any if we do.
My two men are up north, the big man called and said they were going mountain biking on a trail close to my parent's cottage. Little man will be in the Burley trailer, I hope he likes the bumps. I can't write too much about him because I miss him too much. Why is it when they're little, it's so hard to be away. Ok, he's 4 and 1/2, some may not consider that too little but he's still my baby. *sniff*

It's only words.
You.
Can.
Only.
Type.
One.
Word.

No.
Explanations.

1. Yourself: relaxed
2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend (spouse): eating
3. Your hair: longer
4. Your mother: generous
5. Your father: mysterious
6. Your favorite item: yarn
7. Your dream last night: weird
8. Your favorite drink: Coke
9. Your dream car: Mini
10. The room you are in: upstairs
11. Your ex: forgot
12. Your fear: balding
13. What you want to be in 10 years? graduate
14. Who you hung out with last night? husband
15. What you're not? confident
16. Muffins: poppyseed
17. One of Your Wish List Items: stare
18. Time: 7:16
19. The last thing you did: questionnaire
20. What you are wearing: tank
21. Your favorite weather: summer
22. Your favorite book: fiction
23. The last thing you ate: cereal
24. Your life: unfulfilled
25. Your mood: annoyed
26. Your best friend: nope
27. What are you thinking about right now? finishing
28. Your car: boring
29. What are you doing at the moment? thinking
30. Your summer: fun
31. Your relationship status: married
32. What is on your TV? photos
33. What is the weather like? sunny
34. When is the last time you laughed? afternoon

Your turn!

A friend made lunch for me yesterday, it was delicious and we had some great conversation. Then, to top it all off, she took my 4 year old for the rest of the afternoon. Yes, she's one of those good friends. :-)
Then that evening we met up at a really fun park, where all the kids played and my 12 year and her 13 year actually spoke to each other for once. Heh, adolescents of the opposite gender can be so weird with each other at times.

So, it was a good day, then why did it end up with me being mean and unsympathetic to my 8 year old? Granted, she was being unresonable but so was I and since I'm the adult, I figure I should be the one to suck it up sometimes when it's late and she's obviously tired. But I didn't, and she cried and I felt like a crappy person. We made up before she went to bed, but I was stewing about it until I went to bed. Why can I be so understanding about some things but such a creep about others?

Today we spent the day straightening up this mess of a house. My fabulous husband cleaned our youngest kids' room. It was a total disaster. You know the kind where you can't see the floor? While he did that, the 8 year old helped me clean up the living room. My oldest was nowhere to be seen. She was upstairs making something and I was nagging her every few minutes to come down and help. Boy, did I feel dumb when I found out she was up there making me a Mother's Day present. She was so excited about what she made that she gave it to me early and it is the cutest thing. You'll have to wait until tomorrow to see a picture.

The 5 of us are going out to brunch for Mother's Day tomorrow and then off to Tess' piano recital. It should be fun. I can't wait to hear my persnickity 4 year declare that nothing at the brunch is good for him to eat. lol

I am still sleeping way too much, I know it is an avoidance tactic. Could it be more obvious? haha
What am I avoiding? hmmm, that's not as obvious. Let's see, housework, talking animals for the 50th time,
exercise, cooking. I was just not cut out for the life of a housekeeper. Stay at home mom, yes, I can do that
when it involves playing with the kids, doing arts and crafts, reading books to them.

But I'm just lousy at housework, I can't keep up, I get annoyed and oh so bored and the husband is
really getting oh so frustrated with me. I am home all day, why can't I get some laundry done? Why is the
house a constant mess? It isn't fair, I feel guilty, fall into spiral of self-loathing and then do nothing.

I am so predictable.

At least I'm still creating, the only positive thing I am doing, apparently. Can you guess the theme?

Two new postage stamp ATCs, I like the praying mantis one the best. LOL


Ten Two Studios is offering free downloads again. There will be a new download from today until May 13th.
Have fun! http://www.tentwostudios.com/countdown/

Been finishing up a lot of ATC swaps. The first set is Postage Stamp Head People, the second set is for Candy.
Aside from the ATC making, this has been a very unproductive weekend. I've been plagued by 2 migraines and spent half of today in bed. Not fun when the weather is so beautiful and your whole family is over all their various illnesses. Oh well, I popped an Imitrex and all is well now. Too bad it's 6:30 pm.

We went up north for Easter and spent the whole week afterward there at my parent's cottage. My husband took the week off, it was a lovely time. The girls and I were very crafty with polymer clay, I finished the Lucy bag I had been knitting for months and the Boy and his daddy had a lot of male-bonding. LOL

Check out this photo of the annual Easter Egg hunt at the town's historical village. Yep, sneakers in the snow, no gloves and the Easter Bunny looms creepily in the backround. We take good care of our youngin's 'round here. LOL

But really, they all had a great time, even though mama forgot to pack the snow boots and snow pants.
Dang Michigan weather, it's supposed to be spring!

oh, go check out this site, each day from April 1st to April 8th they are sharing images you can downlaod.
I still haven't figured out how to link so her eis the URL.

http://www.tentwostudios.com/countdown/

Cool, huh?

Wah! Now I have the darn cold that's laid my family low for the past week. Wasn't I just complaining about being sick last month? No fair! My oldest is the only one who has remained unscathed, she's practically been locking herself away in her room to keep away from the germs. I can't do that, can I? I knew I would catch it anyway, my 4 year old is always touching my face and mouth and eyes all the time when I lay with him at bedtime.

I made the ATCs above this afternoon, just for the heck of it. I have some collage sheets with vintage images on them and I just love them. It's a gorgeous sunny day today, I must get outside with the kids to forget about my sore throat and stuffy nose.

Look, it's Clocky!

The alarm clock that runs away and hides when you don't wake up. Clocky gives you one chance to get up. But if you snooze, Clocky will jump off of your nightstand and wheel around your room looking for a place to hide. Clocky is kind of like a misbehaving pet, only he will get up at the right time.

No stock in the company, I just think it's funny and perfect for me, the one who is impossible to wake in the morning.

It's spring, it's raining, I have 2 sick kids in the house! oooh, thunder and lightning! cool!

Well, the vomits are over but the sore throat, coughing and runny noses remain and that would be ok if not for the fact that the girls and I had some really fun plans this weekend that we now probably should cancel due to illness. I am so bummed!
We were going to go up north to my parent's cottage with 3 of my friends and their daughters for a Mom and Daughter weekend, we have been looking forward to this for months. Damn germs, I really hope we'll be able to reschedule.

Argh, I let myself get behind on a bunch of Swap-Bot swaps and I'm paying the price with bad ratings! I'm mortified, I'm usually a relatively conscientious swapper and I hate seeing those bad ratings in my profile. So I've been diligently working on them all week and feeling guilty everytime I get a cool swap in the mail. I'm almost caught up and have vowed to not join anymore swaps until I've finished everything.

Still have these to go:

1. Dragonfly ATCs make 3 for 3
2. Dollar Store Easter Swap
3. Altered Vintage Tin (this is way late!)
4. Photo Scavenger Hunt
5. Latin Matchbox Shrines 1 for 3
6. I Love Paris ATCs
7. Cute Socks and a Card

I know, I've got to get out of here and back to work!

BTW, the first ice show performance went very well last night. My girl looked so poised and confident out there. She says she wants to join the figure skating club and the sychronized skating teams now, oh boy. :-)

The biggest girl has her ice show this weekend. They are having 4 shows this year! Rehearsals have been going on since early March. Tonight is the 4 and 1/2 hour dress rehearsal, oh jeez, she is going to be so whipped. I think I'll let her go into school late tomorrow so she can sleep in a little bit.

Needless to say, this week has been rather boring, just driving back and forth to the ice rink. My parents have been great about watching the other kiddos while we're at the rink. Back in the old days (3 years ago), the ice shows weren't nearly such a big deal, the kids all wore black pants and sweathsirts and that was that. Now they are huge productions with props, curtains, fancy costumes and lighting. I think the kids like it better and it does make for a more interesting show but I've been writing checks like crazy since January.

I am way behind on a bunch of ATC swaps, I was trying to catch up last night and David was watching me slave away and he said I was running an ATC sweatshop. I was trying to crank them out as fast as I could, I hope my partners like them even though they weren't the best work I've ever done.

What does it mean when you dream Eddie Vedder comes to your house distraught because you told him his best friend Giavonni Ribisi has been murdered and you have seen evidence of it online? Then you continually try to log onto IMDB to show him and you cannot get to it no matter how hard you try. All the while poor Eddie is about to collapse from dread. Then you are in the street with your husband who is holding the plug in your stupid iBook cos it won't work unless plugged in. Real handy for a laptop. Giovanni Ribisi? WTF?

Then you and your husband are in the streets of Seattle (not San Francisco) being chased by drug dealers because you accidentally messed up their client list. Um, yeah.....

There is much, much more but I won't bore you with the rest, it involves rain drenched fanzines in alleys, vodka on the rocks and Eddie Vedder again.

I sometimes have these epic dreams and they freak me out with their realism.

Speaking of epics, Lydia and I were home alone last night and we watched The Godfather together. She sat through the whole thing, I think she liked it. It is one of my faves, of course. I made her close her eyes during some of the more gory parts, she hates blood. Needless to say, she didn't watch the horse head in the bed scene.

My new work area, I am so happy that I *finally* have one area where I can store my tons of supplies and work on my many crafty pursuits. The taple top and shelves it rests on are from Ikea as is the groovy green storage cart (on wheels) and the stool. Note that they both conveniently fit under the table when not in use.

Our house was built in 1929, a bungalow of sorts with an unfinished attic when we bought it. My husband finished the attic and we cut out part of it to have a loft area and get more light into the house. This left the upstairs as one big room and we have slowly been turning it into a more functional living space. We're gettin' there. :-)

The last pic is one the little man took, I was instructed to "look like a goofball".

Here are my cards for the Fabric ATCs swap, I used wool felt and felted the pieces on with wool yarn.

Today is Thursday and I think I'll take K to the indoor soccer field again to play, he really needs to let off some steam as evidenced by the antics I mentioned in my previous post. Crazy kid.

5 reasons why you should never fall asleep with a 4 year old around.

1. Lemons and knives are not a good mix (no blood was spilled thankfully, just lots of juice and pulp)

2. A whole bottle of glue on your brand new Ikea tabletop mixed with paper towels (well, he did try to clean it up)

3. Glue marks on your brand new Ikea footstools (yes, I went on a spree)

4. Blue Tortilla chips imbedded in rug

5. The 'fridge door left open for at least an hour

Yes, I know, I should not have taken a nap, I learned my lesson.

It's winter break here at our house this week and we've done a whole lotta nuthin' and no one seems to care. We went to Kai's play group yesterday and off to Border's so Lydia could use her giftcard, I love shopping at bookstores but it's not as enjoyable with 3 kids who only want to look in the children's section and that other problem of being broke and not being able to buy anything anyway.

Tess had her best friend over today, she spent the night last night. She is really a sweet litttle girl and they've been having a lot of fun together. Lydia is having her best bud over tonight for a sleep over, they will inevitably end up in her room with the door closed all night. You know how those tweens need their privacy.

We had a bunch of friends and their families over for a fondue party last Saturday, there were 10 kids and 8 adults and 4 fondue pots. We had 2 cheeses, one hot oil and one chocolate. yes, it was delicious and fun. The thing that got to me was the older kids, 3 girls and 1 boy, all 11 or 12 years old and I've known all of them since they were babies. One of them being my own 12 year old daughter, of course. It's such a bittersweet time, they are still kids that like to play and goof around but at one point they were all in Lydia's room just talking for over an hour. Just talking.....oh, to be a fly on the wall in that room.

Wah, I have a crummy cold and I'm so struffed up I can barely hear out of my ears. Yucko, it is no fun to have a cold when it's below freezing outside. I have been in an ATC mood. Quite contrasting ones at that. The one with the cicada image is for a Haiku ATC swap, the other set was for a Sideshow Freaks and Geeks swap. Anyone ever see this creepy movie from the 1930s?
*shudder*

The Haiku goes on the back:

In the cicada's cry
No sign can foretell
How soon it must die.

-Matsuo Basho

More ATCs, these were for a No Glue ATC swap. I like sewing on the cards, it's fun.

Kai and I are off to Target, then Jo-Ann's and the post office. Very exciting, right? I have an idea for some No Paper ATCs I need to make and I have to buy a felting needle. Have a great day!

Cutesy alert! I made these ATCs for a We Love Hello Kitty swap at Swap-Bot. I know, you either love her or hate her. The girls and I fall into the first camp.

So instead of just doing whites sorting all day on my husband's birthday, we went to Ikea where he exchanged a defective transformer and I took Kai and Tess to the cafeteria for a snack. Good thing I did because after that we decided to go out for Indian food and of course, the Boy child would not eat anything there. So the not so healthy PB&J Uncrustable he ate at Ikea turned out to be his dinner. Mine and David's on the other hand was delish, Vegetable Pakora, Samosas, Channa Masala, Onion Kulcha, Naan, Vegetable Biryani and Chicken Tikki Masala. Oh so good. I was disappointed in the side of pickle, but you can't have everything, I guess.

Birthday presents for Daddy.
The girls got out their polymer clay and made these adorable creations for their daddy. The 8 year old made the two bears and giant birthday cake tableau and the 12 year old made the bear with neck tie and cute little 'Happy B-day' sign.
Hee, hee, don't look too closely or you'll see some fuzz attached.

Happy birthday to my dear husband! We are the same age now until my birthday in July. Birthdays sure do change as you have children and get older. As he left with Lydia to take her to ice skating lessons, he told me what he really wanted for his birthday.
Was it a nice dinner out? A new power tool? A night at the movies?

Nope.

The poor guy said he really wanted for us to sort through the whites wash and get all the socks paired up.
Pathetic, no? What have we become? LOL

Yes, I am a dork.
I just got this in the mail today and boy, am I excited! I am a total Columbo/Peter Falk fangirl. I own seasons 1-5 and now 6 & 7 on DVD and I watch at least one episode a week. I can quote episodes, I know how many times Jack Cassidy played the killer (that would be 3), which episode starred Martin Sheen as the murder victim (that would be Lovely But Lethal).

I am a complete and total Columbo nerd and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Should I be?

I've always wanted to make microscope slide pendants, here is a sample of my first few tries. I need more practice with the putting on the silver foil tape. Some people use solder to hold the pieces of glass together but I don't mind the look of the tape. I made the group of 3 last night and Lydia did the one with the giraffe. They are really fun and I will definitely make more soon.

I somehow ended up with a subscription to Body & Soul magazine, I think I got it from a freebie site. All I know is that I never paid for it. Anyway, I was reading an article about an American woman who married a Swedish man and now they live on some Scandinavian island with their twins. She wrote a book about Scandinavians and their relationship with the outdoors. The article said that instad of nesting and hibernating in the cold weather months, that we should embrace the change of seasons and go out into the cold and experience winter to the fullest.

Well, my first reaction to that was, yeah, not a bad idea. I get depressed in the winter, I should go out and become one with nature and all that. So this morning I decided that Kai and I should go out for a walk around the block. We bundled up, headed out and I was miserable the whole darn time. It was even sunny but I just could not get into the spirit of it. Kai was fine but I was grumpy and mad at the cold. Yes, a 4 year old was more mature about being cold than I was.

Moral of the story? We won't be moving to any Swedish islands anytime soon and that's the last time some free magazine is going to get me outside in below freezing weather.

Another swap completed. This was a Recycled Stuffie/Softie, the point was to re-use materials. I made a sock doggie out of 3 of my little boy's mismatched baby socks. hee hee, I like the way he came out.

My oldest daughter has had a milestone moment in her life, I won't go into exact details of what that is. Suffice to say, she's growing up and it's bringing all sorts of different feelings up for me. The first one I felt when she shared this news with me was happiness, she's passing into a new world now, something that we can share, she's becoming a young woman and while I am first and foremost her mama, I also feel like I am her friend. We talked about my passing onto this stage of my life, I just happened to also be 12 and in 7th grade at the time. I told her how her grandma reacted when I told her. Not much hoopla, of course, my mom is not known for being very emotional, just very practical. That's ok.

I made her a bracelet and told her I hoped she would remember this day when she wears it. She was very reserved about it and non-plussed, like it's no big deal. Maybe it is no big deal, maybe she talks about it with her friends, I doubt it though. She is not one for talking, I wish she was but I can't force her to be something she's not. I do keep yapping at her about growing up and changes and yes...boys...ugh, she still seems uninterested but I told her I hope she's never embarrassed to ask me anything.
I wish my mom would have told me that, I never talked to her about anything personal, I wish she would have opened that door just a crack.

Oh well, one more daughter to go through this. Not for awhile, I hope, she will be another story entirely.

Happy 2007!